What to do and what not to do when answering in your question box

Have a standard ready for when you're unsure

When you're writing answers in your question box, there are moments when you wonder, "Is it OK to write this?" You might not know how much of your personal life to share, whether it's OK to mention other people, or whether you can add a joke.

If you agonize every time you're unsure, writing answers tends to become a chore. If you have a standard for what to do and what not to do ready in advance, you'll hesitate less and find it easier to write answers smoothly.

Below are practical guidelines you can use when you're unsure about an answer.

Things you can do

Share your own experiences and failures. "Actually, I've been through the same thing." "I once made a mistake like this." Talking about yourself rarely causes problems, even when you're very open about it. In fact, honest self-disclosure can build trust with your followers.

Say "I don't know" honestly. You don't have to give a perfect answer to every question. "Honestly, I don't know much about this area." "I looked it up but couldn't figure it out." Honesty leaves a better impression than pretending to know.

Thank the sender. "Great question." "That's a point of view I'd never thought about." "Thanks for the question." Words of thanks will probably motivate the sender and lead to the next question.

Put your feelings into your answers. "This question makes me so happy." "Honestly, this one made me stop and think." Answers that show feelings have more of a human touch than mechanical ones, and they tend to be more fun to read.

Skip questions. It's OK to skip questions you don't want to answer or can't answer. You don't need to feel guilty.

Things you shouldn't do

Don't write other people's personal information. Don't include the names of third parties or details that could identify them in your answers, like "My friend X..." or "Y at work..." Your answers are public, so it would mean exposing their personal information without their consent.

Don't try to identify the sender. Saying in an answer, "This question is from X, isn't it?" breaks the promise of anonymity. Even if you're sure, don't bring it up in your answer.

Don't expose questions to make fun of them. If you post something like "Look what question I got lol" on social media, other followers may start to fear, "My question might get exposed too," and hesitate to send questions.

Don't push back emotionally. Reacting emotionally to a critical question, like "Huh? What are you even talking about?", could become a spark for backlash. Respond calmly, or skip it.

Don't lie. That includes pretending to know things you don't, or talking about experiences you haven't had as if you had. Lies may be seen through sooner or later. The trust you lose when that happens tends to be bigger than the cost of honestly saying "I don't know."

When in doubt, not answering is an option

Sometimes you'll get a question that makes you wonder, "Should I answer this, or leave it alone?" When that happens, remember that "When in doubt, don't answer" is the safe choice.

If you feel even a little that "Answering this might hurt someone" or "I might regret this later," that gut feeling might be right. Quietly skipping it is wiser than forcing an answer and causing a problem.

It's fine to leave some questions unanswered. After all, you have no obligation to respond to everything. If you stop the moment you feel unsure, it's easier to prevent trouble before it starts. When you can't decide, choose the safe side. That's the basic attitude.

Setting your own rules makes it easier

Agonizing from scratch every time over "Should I answer this?" is hard. If you set your own rules in advance, deciding should get easier.

"I don't answer about other people." "I don't reveal personal information." "I skip crude questions." If you draw lines like these ahead of time, it's easier to decide by checking against them when you're unsure.

Having rules will probably lighten the emotional load of turning things down too. That's because if you can think, "It's my rule," you can sometimes skip a question without feeling guilty. It's also a good idea to write "Some questions won't get an answer" in your profile. Building a framework that protects you first is the key to keeping your question box stress-free.

How to decide in gray areas

Some questions fall into a gray area, fitting neither "things you can do" nor "things you shouldn't do." When that happens, decide with one simple test.

"If 1,000 people who know nothing about me read this answer, would it cause any problems?"

Inside jokes between friends may be funny to the people involved, but to people who don't know the context, they could be confusing or, at worst, come across as unpleasant. Strong criticism of a specific company or product could cause trouble if people connected to it read it.

If this test makes you feel, "This might be a little risky," it's safer to soften how you say it or hold off on answering.

A question box is a tool for having fun. Avoid the things you shouldn't do, and go all in on the things you can. With this simple rule, you'll probably enjoy your question box in a more relaxed way.