Ghosting

Overview

Ghosting refers to suddenly cutting off contact, without explanation or warning, with someone you'd been interacting with. It comes from vanishing just like a ghost. The term spread in the context of dating apps and romance, but it happens online too, including in follow relationships on social media, DM conversations, and running a question box.

Ghosting in question boxes

When a question box owner suddenly stops answering and leaves their question box untouched, it's an experience close to ghosting for their followers. A question box owner who shared Q&As every week stops answering entirely from one day on. Sending questions gets no response. Their social media posts keep going, but the question box alone falls silent.

Followers may get anxious, wondering "was my question bad?" or "do they dislike me now?"

How to let people know when you take a break

When you take a break from your question box, even a one-line announcement can ease your followers' anxiety. A short post like "I'm taking a break from my question box for a while" or "I'll be busy, so I'll be answering more slowly" is enough. There's no need to explain your reasons in detail.

Quitting suddenly without notice and quitting after a quick word are received differently by followers. The first can make them feel "abandoned"; with the second, they're more likely to understand that "something must have come up." Even if you're closing your question box for good, it's a good idea to say "I'm closing my question box. Thank you for everything."

The right mindset when you're on the receiving end

If you sent a question and got no answer, there's no need to see it as ghosting. Question box owners have no obligation to answer every question. There can be all sorts of reasons for no answer: they're busy, they have too many questions to keep up with, it was a hard question to answer, or they simply missed it.

Not taking a missing answer as personal rejection is the trick to enjoying question boxes comfortably. Sending a question is "putting something out there," and an answer is "a gift." Gifts can't be forced. You're lucky if you get an answer, and if you don't, don't let it bother you. Enjoying question boxes with this light attitude is the healthy way to use them.